Things were crazy busy yesterday, not unlike every other day that passes, but this day was different. Filled with opportunities to make money....but everything had to happen NOW....before 5pm! In the midst of me making phone calls, typing proposals and sending off emails.....I hear my husband say to the children, "yep, your mom will be leaving to get groceries any time now.....".
Realizing my entire family was starving for dinner, and my husband had to leave for work in two hours.....I became overloaded. I think I even muttered the "f" word aloud for all to hear. I do remember telling him that dinner would NOT be served tonight and I was too busy to even consider getting groceries. He took the hint (rare occassion, marked the day on my calendar later that evening) and took the children grocery shopping with him. He only spent $100 bucks and came home with 15 minutes to spare. (ie: he needed me to put away groceries, cook dinner and have it complete in 15 minutes while he showered).....At the same moment, I receive an email that I lost on one of my proposals...so I freak out....actually stomping my feet and feeling like I am 5...swearing I will never ever ever send a proposal to that vendor ever again....Gabby is in the fridge, putting away groceries as I have obviously lost all touch with reality, when my huge, immense labor intensive filled pot of home-made, hours and hours of stewing tomatoes, perfecting the seasoning, spaghetti sauce comes tumbling from the second story shelf and lands promptly on the linoleum floor. Lets talk about switching paradigms. My kitchen looked like the bloodbath I was envisioning in my head when I was insane with anger after losing on my proposal. It felt comfortable for a brief second....then reality hit. WHO WILL CLEAN IT UP? Naturally, the roles have reversed. Gabby is now insane with rage...."WHO put that pot on top of this tiny plastic bowl????" (Jenna did)...I took the blame and found myself on the floor, scooping up cold, wet tomato sauce including all the little tomatillos that I cut into quarters......how sad is that? All of it went to the garbage....all of the hard work, love and seasoning I put into my creation (Yes, I am allowed to be emotionally attached as I never cook.....). I was comforted in a small way when Luna (my loving cat) came on the scene and tasted the floor. She didn't stick around to do any more tasting...but at least someone tasted my creation.
After all of the mess was cleaned, won-ton soup was made and Gabby was out the door...I called Mary. We talked about how work is supposed to be fun. That is my next goal. To transform all of "this" into fun.
